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Relationships can be incredibly meaningful and enriching.
At the same time, they’re incredibly hard work and require consistent effort, patience, and compassion to maintain.
Couples’ therapy can entail any or all of the following:
As a couples’ therapist, I look at the pattern that develops when two worlds collide, that is, the ways in which two individuals’ thoughts, feelings, histories, and behaviours interact with each other.
My approach borrows from emotion-focused therapy, which looks at this pattern as an intricate dance where you dance in sync – rather than step on each other’s toes one too many times!
At the same time, I also borrow from attachment and cognitive behavioural frameworks, to honour the fact that, very often, what we learn about love, emotions, and communicating affection can be connected to a long and nuanced family history.
There are many times in my work as a couples therapy when the focus is on repair.
For example, I work with couples after the discovery or revelation of an affair to help facilitate healing.
Betrayal is a devastating emotional experience, and I help couples learn how to heal when trust seems irrevocably broken, and the future seems bleak.
While therapy emphasizes the responsibility of the partner who strayed to work on restoring trust, I gently encourage both individuals in the relationship to take responsibility for their healing and returning a sense of security and hope to the relationship.